Tag Archives: tears

The Reality of You

Thank You, Father, for You, for Your overwhelming love, for the reality of who You are. Where, oh where, would I be without You! I love You, Father…

I tend to get fairly emotional when I am weary and, Lord, I have surely been both the last few days. But I also know that it is far more than weariness that has brought me to tears over the last few days. I have cried and am crying even as I type…because of You. Just thinking of You and all that You have done for me…all that You went through…for me…for all of us…

Readying for last night’s Maundy Thursday service, I listened to Michael Cards, “Come to the Table”, to Twila Paris’s “Lamb of God”, and to Cheri Keaggy’s “In Remembrance of Me” and I wept… In preparation for our Easter Sunrise service, I listened to Sandi Patty’s “They Could Not” and I wept…

Then during last night’s service, we partook of communion. As I called people forward, I stood at the front with the plate and the cup. As they dipped their bread into the cup, I wept… I usually pass along a verbal blessing to each person by name, bidding them to remember what You did for them and conclude with, “bless you.” I could barely get out the bless You through my tears. Even now I weep. Oh, what You did for me, Lord!

Then this morning, before sitting down to type, I read a young mother’s post on Facebook. Thank you, Jennifer, for sharing.

Tonight we went to a passion play. Worried how Clay would respond we sat in the back, next to the door where the characters came in & out. I explained the process of what was happening…for the most part he was mesmerized. I kept asking him “is this real?” And he would respond, “no it’s a play!”

Half way through before Jesus was arrested, Jesus left the stage and came to the door we were standing by! Clay jumped out of my arms and whispered to me “look it’s Jesus! Oh, Mommy, I need to tell him that I love him, please let me go & please come with me.” Once he had my permission he literally ran to Jesus! This gracious man playing the role of Jesus squatted down, held out his hands as Clay ran to him, he hugged tightly, as he normally does…and he whispered in Jesus’ ear, “I love you, Jesus!” The actor hugged him back, and said back to him, “I love you too! Thank you for giving me a hug!”

This happened in the darkness of the scene, in the darkness of the sanctuary, no one knew it happened, except a tearful Mommy, a proud Daddy, a child & Jesus (both the actor & the Son of Man)!

In the darkness of your life, circumstances; look to the one who is reaching out to you waiting for your embrace & waiting for you to hear those words, “I love you too!”

Oh, the reality of who You are, Jesus. And it’s not just at Christmas, nor is it just at Easter. You are alive and well and are by my side. Where, oh where, would I be without You!

Apr 14th, Fri, 5:35 am

Love Lustres at Calvary

The last several days, Father, have been very full and the nights have been short. I’m a little later in coming to sit with You this morning but I am grateful that You are with me always. May I hear what you have to say to me today. I am compelled this morning to just read through today’s Puritan Prayer. It is so full. I must read it over and over, allowing it to speak to me – pausing, pondering, processing – reading it repeatedly, reflectively. Thank You, Lord, for all You have done and continue to do. I owe all I am and ever will be to You.


My Father,
Enlarge my heart, warm my affections, open my lips,
     supply words that proclaim ‘Love lustres at Calvary.’
There grace removes my burdens and heaps them on thy Son,
     made a transgressor, a curse, and sin for me;
There the sword of thy justice smote the man, thy fellow;
There thy infinite attributes were magnified,
     and infinite atonement was made;
There infinite punishment was due,
     and infinite punishment was endured.
Christ was all anguish that I might be all joy,
                       cast off that I might be brought in,
                       trodden down as an enemy
                            that I might be welcomed as a friend,
                       surrendered to hell’s worst
                            that I might attain heaven’s best,
                        stripped that I might be clothed,
                        wounded that I might be healed,
                        athirst that I might drink,
                        tormented that I might be comforted,
                        made a shame that I might inherit glory,
                        entered darkness that I might have eternal light.
My Saviour wept that all tears might be wiped from my eyes,
                         groaned that I might have endless song,
                         endured all pain that I might have unfading health,
                         bore a thorny crown that I might have a glory-diadem,
                         bowed his head that I might uplift mine,
                         experienced reproach that I might receive welcome,
                         closed his eyes in death that I might gaze on unclouded
                         expired that I might for ever live.

O Father, who spared not thine only Son that thou mightest spare me,
All this transfer thy love designed and accomplished;
Help me to adore thee by lips and life.

– The Valley of Vision: A Collection of Puritan Prayers & Devotions
Compiled by Arthur Bennett
 The Banner of Truth Trust, 1975

Sept 14th, Wed, 9;14 am

Tears of Grief and Joy

Father, in this wee hour before the dawn on this Easter Sunday morning I cannot help but think of Mary Magdalene and her friends readying themselves for their journey to the tomb. There are no smiles – they have no reason to. There, I’m sure, were tears – they have every reason to.

Jesus is gone – they are still in shock. How did things spiral out of control so quickly? But…they blow their nose and wipe their tears for there is a job to be done. Jesus had done so much for them, the least they could do was to lovingly care for his body. The Sabbath was almost over, only three days had passed. They still had time before his body began to decay. It would be difficult seeing him lying there, touching his now cold skin, but it needed to be done.

As they headed out darkness was still about but they wanted to be there for the task at hand as soon as the morning light broke the horizon as they came closer, it dawned upon them that they would have to move the stone that had been rolled over the entrance of where His body lay. I was way too big for them to move – what were they to do? But they were almost there – they would figure something out. As the sun crept over the horizon they could see the shadowy details of Golgotha and tears once again threatened to rise but there was work to do and they would do it. And then they were there and nothing was as it should be! The stone had already been rolled away – they had worried for no reason. They carefully and reverently stepped into the tomb and… the body was not there! They knew they were at the right place. They would never forget watching Nicodemus assist Joseph of Arimathea lovingly place the body in its final resting place. These facts were just going through their minds when out of nowhere two beings stood before them blinding them in their brilliant attire. Terrified they fell to the ground. Then came the question. “Why do You seek the living amongst the dead, He is not here, he has risen. Remember what He said?” Luke 24:5-6

What? How could this…? He said so many things that they couldn’t understand. But…wait…he did tell us!! Why didn’t we believe? He is risen? He is risen!

Once more there were tears – but no longer tears of grief but tears of joy! Praise God! We must tell the others and off they went!

Mar 27th,  EASTER Sun, 5:30 am